Bored and Not Feeling Creative = This

1. My uncle once: put a fish down my swimsuit.
2. Never in my life: have I said something like, "It tastes like shit," and really known what shit tasted like in order to make a correct comparision.
3. When I was five: I wanted to be a ballerina.
4. High School is: four years of backstabbing, gossiping, drama-filled crap that you have to get through to be able to move on with your life.
5. I once met: Kirby Puckett. (and no, he didn't try to molest me)
6. There's this girl I know who: used to gross people out by picking someone else's nose and eating it.
7. Once, at a bar: I got hit on by a guy...but just once.
8. Last night: I got home from the Vikings/Giants game and got to spend even more time with my "date". Good times were had by all.
9. Next time I go to church: will probably be on Christmas Eve.
10. When I turn my head left, I see: my textbook staring me in the eye and telling me to stop stalling and start studying.
11. When I turn my head right, I see: old exams that are telling me that I'm behind and I seriously need to get my ass off my computer chair and open up my textbook.
12. How many days until my birthday?: 7 days
13. If I was a character written by Shakespeare I'd be: that one chick in that one play that he wrote. (Seriously, the only female character I can think of at this point is Juliet, and I don't want to be her. She's a whore.)
14. By this time next year: I will be living in the garbage dump that is New York City and I will be working 12 hour days as someone's bitch in the hospital.
15. A better name for me would be: something that was spoken in a crazy African language so you could only pronounce it by making clicking noises.
16. I have a hard time understanding: why Carl Pohlad and Terry Ryan are trying to ruin the very team that they work for.
17. If I ever go back to school I'll: be upset because that means that I failed out of medical school.
18. You know I like you if: I tell you I like you. I don't like to beat around the bush with that kind of crap.
19. If I won an award, the first person I'd thank would be: my mom for making me fearful for my life if I wound up to amount to nothing.
20. Take my advice: Do not pour yourself a bowl of Life cereal unless you intend to eat it immediately.
21. My ideal breakfast is: French toast, scrambled eggs, sausage, and cinnamon rolls.
22. If you visit my hometown: you'll understand why I miss home and get offended when people say that Minnesota sucks.
23. Why won't someone: pay for my medical school education for me?
24. If you spend the night at my house: you'd better not snore or take up too much space on the bed or I'll roll your ass onto the floor.
25. I'd stop my wedding if: someone decided to air raid the church.
26. The world could do without: people who piss me off.
27. I'd rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: lick the belly of a dirty earthworm.
28. My favorite blonde is: my "date" for the game last night, for the time being anyway.
29. Paper clips are more useful than: rubber bands.
30. If I do anything well, it is: masking my sarcasm so that people think I'm serious, which tends to get me in trouble.
31. And by the way: I apologize if this post didn't entertain you. I really, really just don't want to study.